Just A Nobody

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This blog was started to share the journey of what God has called me to do, serve our friends whithout homes. A long the way it has also become part of my journey as well.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Finding God Again!

I wrote a blog a long time ago called “Finding God in the small things” or something to that sort. I told about how when I started going to the park that the Lord would show me or reveal himself to me in the small things. He would direct my attention to someone and show me how He sees them. Someone who you just could not reach, you would pray for time and time again and one day He would breakdown the walls of their heart and they would just open up. He showed me the special love He has for each and every one of his children and most of all the deep unconditional love He has. There are thousands of things I learned about the heart and love of the Father there in the park.

Today after the park, one of the guys asked if I would give him a ride back to the halfway house where he was staying. Hippie dude (my nickname for him) has been one of those that I have known since the first time going to the park. The first six months of knowing him, well I can’t say I knew him; he actually wouldn’t give me the time of day to tell you the truth. Those first few months I would respect his boundaries, offer him something to eat and let God deal with the rest. One day as I was leaving I heard someone yell “Hey sister”, I turned to see who had yelled and it was Hippie dude. I thought okay here we go. I have been yelled at, cussed out and many other things those first months in the park and here I thought I was going to get it again. The Lord taught me well in this area. My first instinct when this happened would be to fight back. Thank you Lord for speaking to me before I would open my mouth. He would very gently speak to my heart and would say, “They have been hurt and are still hurting. They don’t want to be hurt anymore, so they try and push you away. If they let you in, they are afraid you will hurt them more. So, just love them period.” So like I said I was ready for what every Hippie dude was going to dish out and I would react in way I always did, stand there smile, let them vent on me and as I would leave I would just say “I still love you.” The look on their face was always priceless. That day though Hippie dud just very calmly looked at me and said “I love you.” God was opening up a heart. Things happen slowly in the park and little things like that may not seem like much to some, but to me that is a beautiful move of God.

So we flash forward a year and a half and people are comfortable with us now. They open up more freely and they let the walls down much quicker. They feel safe and they feel loved. Today Hippie dude loaded up his bike and we headed down the street to his place. He turned to me and said “Hey sister, are you like religious?” I told him that I think that being religious and having faith are to different things. That anyone can be religious, but I had a deep faith. I told him I was a Christian and that my faith and love for Christ was very special to me. “Oh” was the response I got from him. Then he turns again and says “you guys are different and not now, but can we talk about it one day?” “Anytime you want to my friend, anytime” was my response. God was working all this time in my friend’s heart and I missed it. We had gone from complete rejection to trust, to acceptance, “I love you” and friendship, but God didn’t stop there.

I started looking for God in the big things, not seeing or hearing Him as often, then I found Him again still working on the small things, where He does His biggest work…in the Heart! May I continue to see the transformation that the love of God can do in someone’s heart and life, no matter how long it takes. May I never stop seeing or hearing Him in all the small things. It’s the small things that I long for! It’s the matters of the heart that I want to stay focused on, everything else God will take care of!

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